


Pitching a Proposition

by Assassin_J



Category: Screen Rant Pitch Meetings
Genre: Comedy, Fade to Black, M/M, Screenplay/Script Format, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-21
Updated: 2019-03-21
Packaged: 2019-11-27 02:47:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18188774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Assassin_J/pseuds/Assassin_J
Summary: Producer Guy: So I hear you have a sequel for me?Scriptwriter Guy: Actually no, that was a lie I told your secretary.Producer Guy: What, you're not actually pitching the script forGreen Book 2: Fifty Shades of Green?Scriptwriter Guy: No sir! I actually wanted to get in your pants!





	Pitching a Proposition

Producer Guy: So I hear you have a sequel for me?

Scriptwriter Guy: Actually no, that was a lie I told your secretary.

Producer Guy: What, you're not actually pitching the script for _Green Book 2: Fifty Shades of Green_?

Scriptwriter Guy: No sir! I actually wanted to get in your pants!

Producer Guy: You know what that's actually a relief! _Green Book 2: Fifty Shades of Green_ sounded like it would be an absolute garbage fire.

Scriptwriter Guy: Yeah I should have made up a better fake movie name. The only fire I have is the fires of lust smoldering in my loins!

Producer Guy: Hell yeah! I'm down for this!

Scriptwriter Guy: Wow, okay, I thought this would be a harder sell. Do you sleep with all the screenwriters?

Producer Guy: Definitely not, but for some reason you are really really attractive to me!

Scriptwriter Guy: Thanks, you're pretty great-looking too! Oh but, one question, please don't be offended!

Producer Guy: Lay it on me!

Scriptwriter Guy: Do you have anything I could catch?

Producer Guy: Nah my test came back all negative last time I had a wild night!

Scriptwriter Guy: I'm clean too!

Producer Guy: Aw, sexual health is tight!

Scriptwriter Guy: Bet that asshole is tight too!

Producer Guy: Ooo, I'm not super comfortable being the bottom!

Scriptwriter Guy: But hey! I'm the pitching guy so you'll have to be the catcher!

Producer Guy: Uh.

Scriptwriter Guy: Do you see what I did there?

Producer Guy: I do and it's not really funny right now!

Scriptwriter Guy: See, because pitcher and catcher can be slang for top and bo-

Producer Guy: Please don't explain the joke!

Scriptwriter Guy: How are we going to do this then? I can't bottom; my ass is too flat.

Producer Guy: Oh I've seen  _ way  _ flatter! Whenever you leave my office I kinda enjoy the show!

Scriptwriter Guy: Thanks for the compliment I guess! I still don't want to bottom! Ugh, sexual negotiation is harder than I remember.

Producer Guy: No, c'mon, it's super easy! Barely an inconvenience! We can mutually masturbate and maybe sixty nine a little!

Scriptwriter Guy: Oh that sounds great!

Producer Guy: It sure does! Let's get at it, baby!

Scriptwriter Guy: Make sure your secretary doesn't interrupt us.

Producer Guy: He won't; he's always watching porn at his desk out there, so he won't even notice what's happening!

Scriptwriter Guy: Wow, he sounds like a terrible employee!

Producer Guy: Well it could have been porn or it could have been _Batman & Robin_.

Scriptwriter Guy: Same difference, haha!

Producer Guy: I'm taking off my pants now!

Scriptwriter Guy: You see, because  _Batman & Robin_ had a lot of porn-quality writing and weird kinky con-

Producer Guy: Stop explaining your jokes! Put your mouth to better use here!

Scriptwriter Guy: Oh, don't mind if I do! ( ͡° ل͜ ͡°)


End file.
